Saturday night=wasted Britt

Hi my beautiful lovers!!! My night does not compare to Kori's. I didn't whoop some bitch's ass or get arrested, but I did get wasted. Big surprise eh? So this might be kind of long..we shall see!

Abby and I were gonna go to Posh in downtown Akron, but then we got a call from Carp (yes, that is what we call him) saying that he and his friend Josh wanted to get a card game together...and we should come over. So, to his lovely abode we went! Once we got there, we got in the backseat of his lovely Mazda3 (which I love) and went to the liquor store. I grabbed this big ass bottle of rum and a twelve pack of cock..I mean coke. LOL! So we went back to his house and started playin a game that I think is called Kings...anyways, that shit is fun as fuck. That was like...brittany=instantly smashed. They tried to make one of the rules something about removing a peice of clothing..I said Ummm, my fat ass ain't takin' off any fuckin' clothes, so you might as well forget that shit! lol- So they did. Carplito is 24 and his friend was 22 I think...anyways, they were hilarious as hell. Mostly I just sat in my seat and talked about sex the whole time. I swear, I am honestly a perv. LOL!!

So Abbers and Carp went upstairs to "fool around w/the XM radio" b/c I wanted some fuckin' shit I could shake my ass to...so by this time we'd already played two rounds of this game, the rum was gone and we'd only been there for...uh..an hour and a half so I was fuckin' shit faced. I don't quite remember all the events of the evening, but I do remember crying when the Akon song came on...something about nobody wants to see us together...so they changed that shit to Top Back w/T.I and every other black man who know how to rap in the universe and basically I fuckin' danced like wonder woman...okay, but I'm getting ahead of myself. Basically, they went upstairs and Josh and I were sitting at the table, talking I think? Anyways, I stood up and went and stood against the wall...and put my head down and I think I could have slept like that right then. Anyways, he came over..he's like 6'4 I think (and hot as hell) and tried to fucking kiss me. I looked up at him and he says, "Your eyes are...gorgeous." The look on my face must have been like..wtf? Atleast that's what I was thinking...so then he put his hands on my face and tried to kiss me! Um..no. Good thing the song changed b/c I just sort of "danced" my way out of his hands, laughed so it wouldn't be too weird and that was that.

The thing that bugged me is that yea, I think I was flirting with him, but I don't even know him. I am not a girl who can just...fool around with a guy b/c he's there. Some girls can, I just can't. I can't imagine letting anybody in my pants who didn't know me as person first. Sorry, but I just can't fuckin' do that shit! So then what did he do? He asks me for my number and says he wants to take me out to dinner this week sometime. I don't do well w/turning people down. It's not like I might not be able to like him or whatever...but I just don't want that right now and I'm not interested. Yea, I'll be his friend...he can take me out to dinner and pay for me, but I just want to be his friend. If he calls, that's what I'll tell him. I just don't need that right now, I have too many other important "things" to take care of! Plus, even flirting with the dude made me feel guilty as hell for some reason...

So Abby sobered up and we went back to her house and watched Diary of a Mad Black WOman and laughed our asses off. I don't think I fell asleep until atleast five am. Oh, and hahaha! She told me that in the car on the way home that I was talking non-stop about prison break. Which she doesn't watch, so she didn't understand a damn thing I was saying..she said I just kept telling her how I'm gonna be like fuckin' Haywire..but not kill my parents and go to jail, but just build a raft and set sail for Holland and I told her not to worry b/c since Haywire's dead, I have his map. I did ask her to help me gather supplies. LOL! I'm so weird.

On a sadder note, my great grandma is back in the hospital, and she won't be coming back out...she has leukemia and lung cancer and now her kidneys are failing and she doesn't want treatment..she is afterall 87. It was so fucking hard for me today to see her like that. She was basically unresponsive, but I sat in the chair and held her hand for like three hours. Almost my whole family was there and before I left I made everybody bow their heads and pray with me for my grandma. I am always the one who ends up saying the prayer at family gatherings, so this wasn't any different. Of course, I had a break down afterwards, but I know that it is in God's hands now and that makes me feel better, it gives me the strength I need in times like these. Family is all I have...and I'm slowly losing everybody.

Well, that was certainly depressing. I'm gonna go watch The L Word and then go to sleep. I am exhausted. I love you guys!

Mwah*
Brittanica