Sex Talk.

Some interesting thoughts, and my even more interesting thoughts on those interesting thoughts. Wow, that was "corn-fusing"!!!

1) 94% of men lie about their penis size. According to condom manufacturers, only 6% of men use extra large condoms.

My comment: Well no shit! I could have told you that!

2) The average man is 5 inches long when erect(no matter what you have heard ladies, that's the truth).

My comment: I can deal with five inches. I will handle those five inches fucking well.

3) 80% of American men are circumsized. Even though Pediatrics say it is not necessary.

My comment: Go figure I'd get stuck with the asshole in the 20%.

4) No matter what all the ads say, nothing can make your penis grow but time (most men reach the end of their growth by the early 20's)

My comment: I know how to make a penis grow, and I'll do it for free.

5) There is no correlation between penis size and shoe size, hand size, or nose size.

My comment: That is so true! Don't let the shoe size deceive you, ladies!

6) Blue balls does exist! It's technically called "prostatic congestion."

My comment: Well last time I saw a naked smurf I saw blue balls, don't even try to fucking lie to me. But seriously, if you have "prostatic congestion", I think I can clear that up for you...

7) Only 16% of men shave their privates.

My comment: Come on boys, gotta keep it tidy now. Get with it, yo!

+Some stuff on the ladies+------------------------------

1) Only 9% of women around the globe consider themselves "attractive" (20% of British women do). 43% of women use the term "natural", 24% saythey have "average" looks, 8% prefer the term "feminine", 7% say they are "good looking", and 7% say they are "cute", and finally only 2% of women say they are "sexy".

My comment: Hmm...I don't ever use the word "natural" or "average"! I guess I mostly use cute...that's what I hear the most. :)

2) An estimated 85% of women wear the wrong size bra.

My comment: I know my size biatch! 36DD. Damn skippy!

3) 60% of women have had breast implants.

My comment: Yay! I'm in the 40% here! My breasts are straight up REAL!

4) 75% of women dont like oral sex

My comment: WHo the fuck?

5) 95% of women shave their privates.

My comment: Thank God.

+Both+--------------------------------

1) Masturbation is healthy for both men andwomen.

My comment: Great, I'm normal.

2) 70% of highschoolers have had sex beforethey have graduated. 27% loose their virginity senior prom night. Only 3% wait until marriage.

My comment: I'm in the 70% here. It's not premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married!

3) 95% of men would have sex with a girl after 1 month of dating. Only 10% of women feel this way.

My comment: Ha, I did. I make up that 10%. Now, if I could do it over again, I never would have done that.

5 Reasons Why Sex is Good+---------------------------------------------

1) It is a good workout. Sex burns about 150 calories every half an hour of it. It will lower your cholesterol and improve breathing circulation.

My comment: Sign me up for a sex workout baby! Can it cure asthma, or send me into a full blown asthma attack?

2) You won't get sick. According to research if you have sex 1-2 times a week you are less likely to get sick.

My comment: That explains a lot....I'll tell my doctor next time I'm sick that I haven't been having sex..I'll get his opinion on this.

3) You'll feel happier. You will feel a greater sense of well-being. Women who have more sex were clinically proven to be less depressed than women who dont have sex.

My comment: Okay. I really need to get out and screw some people! LOL!

4) Makes you look better - [ problem is, ugly people don`t get any ]. Sex releases hormones in you which make your skin and hair softer and shinier and tone your physique.

My comment: I want soft skin and shiny hair! That's no fair!!! Also, so that's why ugly people are so ugly...

5) (The best reason) You will live longer. Studies prove that sex makes you live longer. Men who had sex 1-2 times a week had half the death rate as those who did not indulge themselves at least once a month. It also makes you look younger. If you have sex 3 times a week you may look up to 10 years younger than you really are.

My comment: My Grandma must have had a shit load of sex! Well, she did have four kids, but...damn! All the women in my family live for quite a long time...we be slutty ova here! Sex 3 times a week? *Records that in mental journal*

Did You Know?----------------------------------------
1) Having sex 3 times a week for 1 year adds upto running 75 miles!!!!

My comment: Well good because ain't no fucking way I'm running 3 miles, let alone fucking 75!


So basically what I'm trying to say is..GET OUT AND HAVE SOME DAMN SEX ALREADY! LOL!

Have a wonderfully ridiculous day! Get outrageous!

Love you.
Britter Titters

Thanks and Goodbyes

You guys...you mean soooo much to me! I love you all so freaking much! I can't believe how open I can be with you all and I haven't even met you! It's awesome! I love that I can come on here and ask for support and advice and nobody judges me on it. That means so much..you can rarely find friends like that in "the real world". So thank you.

The following is sad, so be forewarned. I went a little nuts and just typed and typed my heart out. So yes, I went overboard..but you guys know I tend to do that sometimes...

My Grandma passed away on February 26 at around 6:30pm. It happened really fast, faster than anybody really could have imagined. The thing was, she was in her house and I'm so glad she was able to be in her house. The weird thing is, you all know how I have a very weak stomach. I had been holding her hand (she was unresponsive) for like half an hour and it was like 6:15pm when I got up to go in the bedroom and lay down. I could tell her breathing was changing and I made that comment to my cousin, and he agreed. The thing was I could feel her squeeze my hand every once in a while, I don't know if it was her, aware of me being there, or if it was a spasm.

So I went back and laid down and no sooner had I started to drift off, everyone started yelling. "BRITTANY, GET OUT HERE NOW! HURRY!" I thought I was dreaming at first b/c when I sleep I get sooo fucking loony sometimes and it takes me a minute to come back to reality, but when the yelling didn't stop, I jumped up, ran down the hallway, to see almost my entire family (about 20 people) around her bed, just bawling like maniacs. I pushed my way up to the bed and grabbed her hand again. It was sooo insane because everything was going so fast and I just wanted it to slow the fuck down! I heard "We still have a pulse, not much, but it's there." "Where's Herb (my great uncle, her son)" "Come on mom, don't leave me." All I could do was stare at her. She looked so small and peaceful laying there. I was holding her hand. She hadn't taken a breath in like 20 seconds, but suddenly she took one, right as Herb came running in. It was seriously like a scene out of a movie. We all sort of cleared a spot for him, he took her hand and said something like, "Mama, I'm here, it's okay." Then he broke down. The thing is, my Uncle Herb is a man who rides Harley Davidson bikes and is a hardcore dude, when he started crying like a baby...it was like Pandemonium 2007. She didn't take another breath, she had been waiting for him to get there before she could go.

The only thing I could do, was immediately start The Lord's Prayer. It was so powerful. To hear my cousins, ages 4-27, my aunts and uncles, my mom...to hear that prayer being spoken so loudly, through all the tears...I have never felt anything so intense in my life. The thing that happened next..I mean, I knew she was dead, but suddenly it hit me, and it hit me hard. I kind of backed away, my cousin Orrie looked at me and he could tell by the lack of color in my face what was gonna happen. I heard him saying "Britt, Britt, sit down." He rushed over to me, right as my knees gave out and sort of pulled me over to the couch and I just sat on his lap and cried. I was feeling sick to my stomach, because, hello..I just saw somebody die. I can't get over that. It was just too much to handle.

We left like an hour later, I didn't want to be there when Hospice came to take her away. I couldn't be there for that. The calling hours/funeral will be hard enough. I have been writing something to say at the service, it will be hard, but I feel I need to do it. When I have it written, I'll post it. I owe my Grandma atleast that.

Here is a picture of my Great Grandma and Great Grandpa...

Together again.

True Love <3

So thanks again you guys, for everything. The greatest feeling is coming home from a shitty day, signing onto our forum/blog/msn and getting to talk to you guys and just laugh my ass off, with no worries. I love you all!

Mwah
Brittany

Which one are you?

VIRGO: The Virgin
Dominant in relationships. Sexy. someone loves them right now. Freak in bed. Always wants the last word. Caring. Smart. Intellectual. Attractive. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Hard to forget. Love at first sight. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. The one and only. Ultimate sexiness.

SCORPIO: The lover
Can be mean. EXTREMELY sexy. Intelligent. Energetic. Predict future. Most erotic. (Freak in bed.) (GREAT kisser.) Always get what they want. Sexy. Attractive. Easy going. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. The sexiest ever....Romantic. Caring.

LIBRA: The sex addict
Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing n Bed..!!! Did I say Amazing in Bed? not the kind of person you wanna fuck with... u might end up crying... the most irresistible.

ARIES: The Liar
Outgoing. Lovable. Spontanious. Not one to fuck with. Erotic. Funny. Take you on trips to the moon in bed. Excellent kisser EXTREMELY sexy. Loves being in long relationships.=) Addictive. Loud. best in bed.

AQUARIUS: Does it in the waterTrustworthy. Sexy. Great kisser. One of a kind. Loves being in long-term relationships. Extremely energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed your expectations. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out. Amazing in bed, THE BEST LOVERS BETTER THAN EVERYONE!

GEMINI: Does TwosomesNice.
Love is one of a kind. Lover not a fighter, but will still knock you the fuck out. Trustworthy. Always happy. Loud. Talkative. Outgoing VERY FORGIVING. Loves to make out. Has a beautiful smile. Generous. Strong. ULTRA SEXY. THE MOST IRRESISTABLE.

LEO: The Lion in bed
Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at sex. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Loyal.Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Great when found.

CANCER: The Cutie
MOST AMAZING KISSER. Very high sex appeal. Great in bed!!! Love is one of a kind. Very romantic. Most caring person you will ever meet! Entirely creative. Extremely random and proud of it. Freak in bed. Spontaneous. Great tellin stories. Not a Fighter, But will Knock your lights out if it comes down to it. Someone you should hold on to.

PISCES: The Piece of ass
Caring and kind. Smart. Center of attention. Too Sexy, DAMN IT. Very high #S#E#X appeal. Has the last word. The best to find, hardest to keep. Fun to be around. Freak in the sheets. Extremely weird but in a good way. Super good in bed. Good Sense of Humor!!! Thoughtful. A partner for life. Always gets what he or she wants. Loves to joke. Very popular. Silly, fun and sweet.

CAPRICORN The passionate Lover
Love to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Predict future. Irrestible, awesome kisser. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. BY FAR the BEST in BED. Very sexy. Coolest. Loves to own Gemini's in sports.Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Loves to be your first. So you'll never forget. Smart.

TAURUS The Tramp
::Aggressive. Freak in bed. Rare to find! Loves being in long relationships Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Sexy as ........ Loves to help people in times of need. Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality. Stubborn. Sexual as ......... Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind. Not one to fuck with. Are the most sexiest people on earth!

SAGITTARIUS. The Sexy one
Spontaneous. Horny. Freak in Bed. High appeal. Rare to find. Great when found. Loves being in long relationships. The one. So much love to give. Not one to mess with. Very pretty. Very romantic. Nice to everyone They meet. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, fun and sweet. Have own unique sexiness. Most caring person you will ever meet! Amazing in Bed..!!! Did I say Amazing in Bed? Not the kind of person you wanna mess with you might end up crying.



Pretty much, I'm The Sexy One..Sagittarius all the way baby! I think that describes me perfectly! Woot! :)

Post who you are and if you think it's right or not!

Kisses*
Britters

Saturday night=wasted Britt

Hi my beautiful lovers!!! My night does not compare to Kori's. I didn't whoop some bitch's ass or get arrested, but I did get wasted. Big surprise eh? So this might be kind of long..we shall see!

Abby and I were gonna go to Posh in downtown Akron, but then we got a call from Carp (yes, that is what we call him) saying that he and his friend Josh wanted to get a card game together...and we should come over. So, to his lovely abode we went! Once we got there, we got in the backseat of his lovely Mazda3 (which I love) and went to the liquor store. I grabbed this big ass bottle of rum and a twelve pack of cock..I mean coke. LOL! So we went back to his house and started playin a game that I think is called Kings...anyways, that shit is fun as fuck. That was like...brittany=instantly smashed. They tried to make one of the rules something about removing a peice of clothing..I said Ummm, my fat ass ain't takin' off any fuckin' clothes, so you might as well forget that shit! lol- So they did. Carplito is 24 and his friend was 22 I think...anyways, they were hilarious as hell. Mostly I just sat in my seat and talked about sex the whole time. I swear, I am honestly a perv. LOL!!

So Abbers and Carp went upstairs to "fool around w/the XM radio" b/c I wanted some fuckin' shit I could shake my ass to...so by this time we'd already played two rounds of this game, the rum was gone and we'd only been there for...uh..an hour and a half so I was fuckin' shit faced. I don't quite remember all the events of the evening, but I do remember crying when the Akon song came on...something about nobody wants to see us together...so they changed that shit to Top Back w/T.I and every other black man who know how to rap in the universe and basically I fuckin' danced like wonder woman...okay, but I'm getting ahead of myself. Basically, they went upstairs and Josh and I were sitting at the table, talking I think? Anyways, I stood up and went and stood against the wall...and put my head down and I think I could have slept like that right then. Anyways, he came over..he's like 6'4 I think (and hot as hell) and tried to fucking kiss me. I looked up at him and he says, "Your eyes are...gorgeous." The look on my face must have been like..wtf? Atleast that's what I was thinking...so then he put his hands on my face and tried to kiss me! Um..no. Good thing the song changed b/c I just sort of "danced" my way out of his hands, laughed so it wouldn't be too weird and that was that.

The thing that bugged me is that yea, I think I was flirting with him, but I don't even know him. I am not a girl who can just...fool around with a guy b/c he's there. Some girls can, I just can't. I can't imagine letting anybody in my pants who didn't know me as person first. Sorry, but I just can't fuckin' do that shit! So then what did he do? He asks me for my number and says he wants to take me out to dinner this week sometime. I don't do well w/turning people down. It's not like I might not be able to like him or whatever...but I just don't want that right now and I'm not interested. Yea, I'll be his friend...he can take me out to dinner and pay for me, but I just want to be his friend. If he calls, that's what I'll tell him. I just don't need that right now, I have too many other important "things" to take care of! Plus, even flirting with the dude made me feel guilty as hell for some reason...

So Abby sobered up and we went back to her house and watched Diary of a Mad Black WOman and laughed our asses off. I don't think I fell asleep until atleast five am. Oh, and hahaha! She told me that in the car on the way home that I was talking non-stop about prison break. Which she doesn't watch, so she didn't understand a damn thing I was saying..she said I just kept telling her how I'm gonna be like fuckin' Haywire..but not kill my parents and go to jail, but just build a raft and set sail for Holland and I told her not to worry b/c since Haywire's dead, I have his map. I did ask her to help me gather supplies. LOL! I'm so weird.

On a sadder note, my great grandma is back in the hospital, and she won't be coming back out...she has leukemia and lung cancer and now her kidneys are failing and she doesn't want treatment..she is afterall 87. It was so fucking hard for me today to see her like that. She was basically unresponsive, but I sat in the chair and held her hand for like three hours. Almost my whole family was there and before I left I made everybody bow their heads and pray with me for my grandma. I am always the one who ends up saying the prayer at family gatherings, so this wasn't any different. Of course, I had a break down afterwards, but I know that it is in God's hands now and that makes me feel better, it gives me the strength I need in times like these. Family is all I have...and I'm slowly losing everybody.

Well, that was certainly depressing. I'm gonna go watch The L Word and then go to sleep. I am exhausted. I love you guys!

Mwah*
Brittanica

It's me you bitches!! Wow, that flash was bright as dog shit! But yea, basically that's me as of now..until I change my hair back to blonde, which I am doing ASAP! I look so nuts in that pic! Damn!

Whew, today was so insane. I worked nine hours...it was sweet though b/c I got to see my boys this morning. We call ourselves the Fab four b/c it's me, Charlie, Dick and Lester. Lester is 95, Charlie is 64 and Dick is 77. I love them guys. So we were all gathered around the back extension machine, while Lester was working out and I said "Well, guys, I'm single now." Lester sat up from an extension so fast the weights made a huge bang. He said "Hallelujah! I actually have a fighting chance now!" OMG, we all died of laughter. There had to have been thirty people in there and we're all like family there, man that shit was hilarious.

Nikki and I went out to lunch and just basically talked about other people. LOL! That's what we be doin'! Nahh, just talking about Jenna, my slutty excuse of a cousin who looks nothing like me b/c she's like 5'11" and looks like B-Spears on coke. Yea, that's pretty much it. Anyways, she's such a dumbass. So we talk smack about her. I was so excited b/c our waitress was Amy, a girl who moved here from England back in highschool and I haven't seen her in awhile and I adore her accent. She's fuckin' hot. Haha! Well then!

I got back to work and then right before Darryl (the physical therapist) and Curt (the physical therapist assistant) were about to leave, Darryl took this horrendous shit then they stood there right in front of me and discussed how it looked. I was gagging. I said "Darryl, I swear I better not go back there and see that in the toilet, I'll puke." So then Curt starts talking about how today a patient who is old and the size of the planet jupiter had to have a hip ultrasound today and they make you lay on your stomach and pull your pants down...well, this "individual" had fucking shit all over their ass. REAL FUCKING SHIT! I am not even joking right now! Jesus man. Then that "individual" went in the bathroom before he left, came out and said to me, "There, I left you with my scent."

Who the fucking sam hell does that?! I could not believe my ears! Weird shit be happening to me lately for no damn apparant reason...I'm paranoid now. Yikes! Also, tonight at work Seth and his mom came in to work out. Well, they were finishing up by stretching back by the therapy tables and I needed to put the towels away, so I walked back there and said, "Still watching prison break?!" with a huge ass grin on my face. Hahaha! Seth just walked away, but I did talk to his mom, which was good. I said, "Is he okay?" and she said "Yea, he's still just in shock from everything." I was like, "Becky, he pushed me too far, I couldn't do it anymore. I tried for two and a half years to make it work, we just DON'T go together. It never would have worked." Blah blah blah she said that she completely understood and she's gonna miss me, but atleast she can still see me at work. That made me happy, even though she can be a bitch sometimes too (it's them gemini's that are that way). Basically she told me that sometimes two people in a relationship are just lethal together and Seth and I both have a "dominant" personality. I'm not sure what she was thinking...but she said that we both got lazy in the relationship, got comfortable and it got boring. I agreed, but the thing is that Seth COULD have lived the rest of his life thinking that I am his one and only for the rest of his life and he would have been happy with that. Sorry, that shit ain't me, yo! I even told her the truth about him hitting me. She said she had an idea that was going on...and that she was sorry, but it ain't her fault.

Anyways, Nikki and Derek came into work just so Nikkers and I could laugh our asses off at this bitch from sports medicine class in highschool..she put these pics on her myspace of her fat ass practically naked...shirt off up on some skinny bitch who also has her shirt off. I wanted to throw up b/c I was laughing so hard. It was sooooo something you'd see on Jerry Springer. Nasty trashy ass!

I want to leave you with this picture. All this talk about the size of my boobs, I think by this you can get a pretty good idea of their actual size.

Who's Your Daddy?!

Oh right, I am!

Night night sex kittens...Caroline, don't get too worked up over this boob shot, I know you will be very "aroused by it. Just try to stay calm.

Much love,
Brittanica<3

New blog, bitches!

Heyy babies!!

I'm so glad that we decided to do this! I've missed my Kori, Tricia and Zeeface talkin' dirty to me all the time! My question is if we can find different "templates" like on myspace b/c these one's are so boring!! Anyways, I'm gonna look around now and I'll probably post more later! :)

Much love,
Britters